As most of you know, I got married this summer. What you don’t know is that I have struggled to find balance between my shamanic path and my “regular life”.
Weddings are such a part of the mundane world that, no matter how pagan they might be, they drive you right into materialistic… mundacity. Thoughts of marriage and discussions of weddings are often followed by questions: Will we have a baby? Will we buy a house? How is our budget? Will my new stepchild like/accept me? (Yes, she does. :)) I will be honest, I totally forgot about my oaths and my spiritual path.
Part of this was because this was my first summer juggling a night job, a stepdaughter and wedding plans. Lots of things fell by the wayside, like this blog. I begged for a break, a reprieve from the pressure of the spirit world in May, and I received it. But its not easy coming back to my oaths. So where do we start when we pick ourselves back up and get back on the dusty road?
I start simple. I start with gemstones and conversations. I’m not a huge gemstone lover but I do believe that, as a healer, they are another tool in my mixed bag of health. I believe that the Jotun are close to stones, feel that connection intimately, and that if we can slow down and listen long enough, we can start to hear their messages. So I pull my favorite stones out, cleanse them under running water, whisper them my secrets, wear them as I go about the task of living. I close my eyes, reach out for my spirit guide, tell him my woes, smile as he sends me dreams of standing at the shoreline, the waves lapping at my ankles.
The task of returning to our oaths is the same as returning to anything else that fires us up. We do it gently, with forgiveness for our humanity and an eye to our future.